Αγγλικά λογοπαίγνια – English puns

daeman

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Electile Dysfunction.jpg
 
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nickel

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Το είδα σε τοίχο του Facebook και μου άρεσε:

Όταν καταφεύγεις σε αγγλόφωνο μέντιουμ που σου λέει "May's end will come on the 24th" κι εσύ σπεύδεις να πληρώσεις νωρίτερα τις συντάξεις...
 
Αφού το πήγαμε εκεί, πολλά τα λογοπαίγνια May's - maze τους τελευταίους μήνες, όπως Exiting May's Brexit Maze στο Φορμπζ και τώρα με το May's / Maze Exit.

Όχι, δε διαβάζω Φορμπζ.
 

nickel

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Staff member
"I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets".

Το παραπάνω λογοπαίγνιο κέρδισε στον ετήσιο (12ο) διαγωνισμό αστειότερου λογοπαίγνιου στο Φεστιβάλ Fringe του Εδιμβούργου.

Στη βραχεία νύστα βρίσκουμε τα παρακάτω:

  • "Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they're happy" - Richard Stott
  • "What's driving Brexit? From here it looks like it's probably the Duke of Edinburgh" - Milton Jones
  • "A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, 'Yes, of course. - That's 20 cows'" - Jake Lambert
  • "A thesaurus is great. There's no other word for it" - Ross Smith
  • "Sleep is my favourite thing in the world. It's the reason I get up in the morning" - Ross Smith
  • "I accidentally booked myself onto an escapology course; I'm really struggling to get out of it" - Adele Cliff
  • "After learning six hours of basic semaphore, I was flagging - Richard Pulsford
  • "To be or not to be a horse rider, that is Equestrian" - Mark Simmons
  • "I've got an Eton-themed advent calendar, where all the doors are opened for me by my dad's contacts" - Ivo Graham
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-49389208
 

SBE

¥
Δεν ξερω ποιός είναι ο τιτλατζής του Εκόνομιστ, αλλά κάθε βδομάδα έχει κάτι καλό. Αυτο είναι κορυφαίο.
 

daeman

Administrator
Staff member
...
Today's Lunchbox Lesson: GRAMMAR BAR JOKES

A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

A question mark walks into a bar?

A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

A synonym strolls into a tavern.

At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

Falling slowly, slowly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.


*Author(s) unknown

https://www.facebook.com/analyticalgrammar/photos/a.167941616890/10156850934631891/?type=3&theater
 
They told me I wouldn’t be good at poettry because I'm dyslexic. But so far I’ve made 3 jugs and a vase and they are lovely.
(Το πρωτότυπο έλεγε poetry αλλά νομίζω ότι έτσι είναι πιο αστείο) 😁
 
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