Poem by Nikifoos Vrettakos PΟΔΟΝ ΤΟ ΑΜΑΡΑΝΤΟΝ: translation help

This is the text:

Ἀπὸ νερὸ κι' ἀπὸ χῶμα εἶν' οἱ λέξεις μου, ζυμωμένες
μὲ μπόλικον ἥλιο, μὲ μπόλικη ἀγάπη.
Ὅλες μου οἱ δύσες μὲ βρίσκουν νὰ κοιτάζω τόν οὐρανό μέ λάσπες στά δάχτυλα.
Χτίζω τὴν πολιτεία μὲ τὸ χαμόγελο.
Χτίζω τὴν πολιτεία μὲ τὴν καρδιά.
Χτίζω τὴν πολιτεία μὲ τὰ παιδιά ποὺ θὰ ’ναι ὅλα δικά σου.
Ποὺ ὅταν νυχτώνει θὰ τοὺς πιάνεις τὸ σφυγμὸ καὶ θὰ τὰ νοιάζεσαι.
Ποὺ τὴν αὐγὴ θὰ τοὺς φορεῖς τὰ τριανταφυλλένια τους
καὶ βγάζοντάς τα στὴ σειρά, κάτω ἀπ’ τὰ χελιδόνια,
θὰ τὰ πηγαίνεις στὸ ποτάμι ποὺ θὰ τρέχει ὁ ἥλιος.


This is my attempt at translation for some friends who sent it from Tinos for me to translate. This is how I fared ( the things I am not sure about are in bold type):-


My words are made of water and soil, kneaded
with much sun, with much love.
All my sunsets find me looking at the sky with muddy fingers.
I build the state with a smile.
I build the state with my heart.
I build the state with the children all of whom will be yours.
That when night falls you will take their pulse and care for them.
At dawn you will bear their things soft as rose petals
and washing them in a row
, under the swallows,
you will take them to the river where the sun will run.

Can any colleague suggest improvements to these and indeed any other lines.
 

daeman

Administrator
Staff member
Ποὺ τὴν αὐγὴ θὰ τοὺς φορεῖς τὰ τριανταφυλλένια τους
καὶ βγάζοντάς τα στὴ σειρά,
...
At dawn you will bear their things soft as rose petals
and washing them in a row
,

At dawn you will dress them with their rosy attire
and leading them in a row,

Imagine a duck with her ducklings in a row.
 
Top